Push It To The Limit

Everyone has experienced the pain of a crappy shopping cart. Many problems may be found with the carts: there are only three wheels, one of the wheels has not been oiled since oil was invented, an infant has pooped in or around the child seat area, someone has struck your cart with a vehicle in the parking lot, and anything else you could imagine being wrong with the carts. There seems to be no shopping cart that is even remotely enjoyable to push.

I believe that the crappy shopping cart adds to the frustration of shopping. Shoppers who settle for the hand baskets know what I am talking about. There is little frustration when it comes to finding and operating a little hand basket. Sure you can't put your forty pack of toilet paper in it, but at least you know that you won't be rupturing the ear drums of fellow shoppers with your squeaky cart, dubbed "Tin Man."

I understand that people who use the hand baskets are only shopping for a few things, but my post is not a way to help you fix your crappy cart, or tell you a way to fit your two weeks of shopping into a hand basket. Instead my post is to tell you that I had a completely, amazingly average cart today and it brightened up my day.

So there my room mates and I were, standing in front of the evil empire's fortress, #316. I don't know about you, but does anyone else always forget a kart until they are inside the store? (And I am going to spell cart, "kart", from now on because of my allegiance to Mario Bros.) I know... I am a nerd. Anyway, it took forever to find a kart.

When we re-entered we were instantly provoked by the candy section set up for Halloween. Halloween is my second least-favorite holiday, for your information. We each got a bag of candy to give out on Halloween to the children in our neighborhood. The only problem with that is, we might not have any candy left by the time trick-or-treaters ring our doorbell on Wednesday.

Sorry about the candy tangent. So my kart was just spectacularly average. I was thrilled. There was nothing obviously wrong with my kart. I glided from aisle to aisle with ease and comfort. Sure I didn't know what type of bacteria was on the hand grips, but I didn't care. I was happier than Tanya Harding with a steel pipe in her hands. I would like to tell you that I found something to rant about on this trip, but I was so overwhelmed by the outstanding, non-squeaking glory of my kart, that the negatives slipped my mind.

Next time you go shopping, donate to whatever cause they are promoting. I donated five dollars to breast cancer research today. I normally would, but I was more likely to give more, probably because my kart was just so exceptionally not disappointing.